I miss my brother.

I couldn't stop thinking about him tonight-- about how much I wished I could call him on the phone, talk to him about life, give him a hug... All the things I cannot physically do anymore. I thought about the way he used to say my name in this excited voice he used to do; his voice would get all high pitched and everything. Thanking about that always makes me smile, but it upsets me too, you know? I just want to hug him. I know it would be one of those really good hugs too, because he was over six feet tall and I just know his arms would kind of swallow me in a really comforting way. He always provided some sort of comic relief, and he really loved his little sisters (regardless of how much we may have annoyed him in our younger years, or in Candice's case: regardless of the scars she had given him). I wish I had him in my life right now, and I wish I could call my big brother when things got tough.

I love you Matt, and I miss you so much. Your little sister still thinks about you often. I hope I'm making you proud.