Hanging on a whim :)

Today was good, relaxing, and just fun :) I woke up and had pigs in a blanket for brunch with Hannah and my mom, which made me very happy! Hannah was dying for some Friendly's, so I took her there for lunch. (I didn't get anything though... I ate too many piggies! Haha.) Being very sleepy bears, Hannah and I got back in bed and watched I Am Number Four/took a nap. By the time we woke up, it was time for her departure. I spent a little time packing/internet browsing/memorizing my verses before Candice came over. We had a dinner date this evening for the first time in a while :) It was nice to be able to do that, because normally we're both just really busy. From there, it was off to the Kings of Swing concert with Kathryn and Kelly! I had never been to one before, and I wasn't really sure what to expect, but I had a lot of fun! And let me just say, the first person I saw there was one of my little loves from youth group, Sydney. I was so happy to see her! She literally wrapped her limbs around me and I was holding her like a child. Ahh! I love her :) I also got to see some other lovely individuals: Missy, Rachel, Rachel, Victoria, Whitney, Claire, Daniel, Jason, Brennan, Ethan, and Cameron. So great :) We were singing, dancing, laughing, conga-lining... all sorts of fun things :) While in line at Cookout afterwards, Kelly, Kathryn, and I noticed that Nathan and Devon were right in front of us! Ahhhh! So obviously we had to park our cars and talk in the parking lot :) That was fun. Oh how those boys do make me laugh, haha! We planned on calling it a night after that, but Kathryn, Kelly, and I ended up having a mini heart-to-heart in Kat's front yard, haha. It was good :) I'll just be a little tired in the morning, haha. Tomorrow is going to be long. Tomorrow, at 2 PM, I'm leaving for Kids Camp. I think it's going to be fun, but I am a tad bit nervous. What if I lose one of them? What if they don't like me? What if I start getting sick of them? (I don't want that to happen!) What if I'm so exhausted that I end up being no fun? It's things like that. Hopefully, though, everything will go off without a hitch, and everything will be simply splendid! I'll be praying, that's for sure! Oh! And my little sister is finally home from Guatemala! I'm so happy she's home and she's healthy. (She had been very sick for a few days while she was there.) Praise! Goodbye, all! See you Friday :)

Random facts that go along with my day's events:

1. Being able to sleep in makes me happy.
2. My disposable camera prints make me happy.
3. Kids camp makes me nervous.
4. I'm mediocre at packing.
5. I will never let my kids be sheltered.
6. I've been jammin' out to "Vanity"essentially all day.
7. I love sushi dates.
8. I love Elizabeth.
9. I love Hannah.
10. I love Sweet Frog.
11. Running errands with my mom is frustrating, because she gets frustrated so easily.
12. Learning someone's struggles really humbles my heart.
13. I love my rowdy group of friends.
14. I love how really anyone can hang out with us and it's not awkward.
15. I thoroughly enjoy deep heart-to-hearts.
16. I might be addicted to sweet tea.
17. I've been neglecting my memory verses.... Vanity.

Times Square. Anti-gewgaw. (One of my disposable prints!)

Memories from CT 2k11 that will live on forever:

• "Gewgaw!" and "Vanity!"
• "You neva knew dat!"
• Cuddle sessions/nap time with Juliana :)
• Dunkin-Robins.
• Late-night trips to the legit Amityville Horror house!
• Free hugs :)
• The Bernie and The Cat Daddy :)
• Bedtime funnies with Heather :)
• Kathryn and I belting out Taylor Swift during our freezing cold showers :D
• "I'm about to scuttlebutt!"
• "Like a boss!"
• "Amen"s..... lots of them.
• Crazy games of Mad Gab on Bus 2.
• Story time with John Kelly :)
• Playing with NY kids in parks/playgrounds :)
• Washing our hair/bathing in kitchen sinks.
• "Oh, you like him? You think he's fine?" Hahaha! "NOOO!"
• Praising and worshiping with every ounce of energy in you! 
• Even when it doesn't feel like you have much.
• Never letting that show :)
• The transformation from Sick Tour 2011 to Love Tour 2011 :)

I will rave about Choir Tour forever and ever :)

Choir Tour 2011

This past week was such an incredible blessing. Having the opportunity to spend seven days with 100  individuals who love and yearn for God enough to travel up the east coast to minister to others is something I never thought I would be able to do as a leader. Being able to watch them as they sang, danced, and made music in Jesus's name made my heart full of more joy than I may have ever experienced before. And I'm so glad that I was also able to worship alongside them, because they are so amazing and beautiful, all of them. They have each touched my heart in one way or another, whether by their infectious passion for the Lord, their giving nature, or their boldness in sharing the burdens of their heart. Many of them pushed through illness and emotional stresses, and they even encountered mockery, but it did not phase their ministry.  They poured out their hearts as they led others in worship, they reached out to people they were unacquainted with, they spent time with them, they prayed for them, and they helped lead others to Jesus Christ. Each and every person on this trip is an inspiration to me. I feel as though I have learned so much, and my heart has been truly humbled. I have so much love for my WEAG family, both old and new members :) You are forever molding me as a person, and I could never thank them enough for what they are teaching me. I love each and every one of them, and it is because of that family bond that I will be a youth leader until they force me out :) I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I love what I'm doing, and I love where I'm at. God is revealing Himself to me through these youth, and they are some of my most beloved treasures :) I am so blessed! Thank you, Father, for the spiritual growth and irreplaceable memories :) I thank you that our fellowship was meaningful, and that we could laugh and experience life together as a unit, all in Your name :)

And we're off!

Lezzdoittttt!

Stoked for CT 2k11!

Internship was productive, which was good. However, now I'm not sure if I can wear half my wardrobe on work days anymore.... Kind of a long-ish story that I'm not going to go into. But hey, it is what is. After a trip to the bank, I made my way over to Jade's graduation party/cookout. I got to see some lovely friends and enjoy some yummy food :) Fun stuff! I ran a few other errands before going home. I would say that I got some packing done, but that would be a lie. My mom and sister wanted me to go with them to Bed, Bath & Beyond (we actually ended up at Target). That trip was good, though. I was able to get some short that are appropriate for kids camp/choir tour, so that made me happy. Once we got home, I did get a chance to pack most of my stuff. I took a bit of a break to hang out with Elizabeth, Kim, and Rachel for a bit, which was fun. I cut it a little short, though, so that I could pull together some loose ends. I've been a bit distracted during the whole packing process, unfortunately. I won't lie, I've been watching Sailor Moon (and still am). Haha. No big :)

I'll tell you when I'm super excited for..... CHOIR TOUR!!!! This time tomorrow I will be sleeping in a hotel room in Delaware, the choir having already done a concert in Ocean City :) Ahhh! I loved choir tour so much last year, and I can't wait to see how awesome and different it will be being on the leader side of things! Also, I'm really excited to spend a week with some of my dearest loves! It will be cool to see how God works through everyone during this trip; I'm stoked! Just the fact that I have the opportunity to go makes me feel so blessed! This is going to be so great! Please be praying for the youth choir and leaders involved in choir tour, and the people that will be ministered to! It is much appreciated :)


Well blogging world, this is my last post until the 23rd! Goodbye 'til then!

"See what I just did there?"

Apparently, we have online forums to thank for that little phrase. Thanks for the insight, Adam! It appears we also have them to thank for "pwn" and "ftw" (which, by the way, means "for the win"). Yay fun facts! Haha.

Today was pretty productive! Jenn and I went shopping for travel supplies. I need them for choir tour, and she needs them because she leaves on Saturday for Guatemala! Prayers for her travels and time there, please! She's going to be teaching art classes while she's down there, and I think it will be an amazing experience for her! Be-tee-dubs, Guatemala is in Central America. My father didn't belive Jenn and I when we told him, but it is. Haha.

Proof!!! Ba-da-bing! Speaking of my padre, we came home after our shopping endeavors and ordered a little something to be delivered to his house on Father's Day (since Candice, Jenn, and I will all be gone):

We gave him an edible arrangement last year for his birthday, and he absolutely loved it! So we're hoping he'll enjoy this one too :) He deserves to get at least a little something on actual Father's Day. As for a celebration, the three of us daughters treated him to dinner tonight :) I'd say it was a success! I left from there to go to the kid's camp meeting at church. I will just say this, I am going to be exhausted. I know it'll be fun, but I'm going to need extreme prayer for some energy! Youth group followed that, and it was cool hearing Adam speak. I just wish I had gotten to hear the whole thing... (There were two boys whispering to each other and passing a cell phone back and forth and texting. Not only was it distracting, but it took me a while to quietly get their attention and tell them to put it away. ) Nonetheless, I loved what I got to hear! Kudos! There was some dancing afterwards, including this:

Oh yes, my song :) Twas great! I even got others to do it with me! Ahhhh. I loved it :D

Okay, so I went to this place after I left church:

Here's the thing about Cookout... The line is almost always long. And if it's not, then it still manages to take a while. Another thing, you can't get out of the line once you're in it. Kelly made a good point that this was a clever marketing technique, but still, haha. I may have had to wait for about 15 minutes or more, but I got my much desired sweet tea! Hoorah! I then met Elsbeth and Kelly at my house to watch a beloved show from our childhood years...

Oh yes, Sailor Moon! I own every episode and movie on DVD... I still love it, and I'm not ashamed :) It makes me happy that we watched that tonight. Bahhh :) Well, I need to sleep now. Hooray for another night where I get less than 5 hours of sleep! Lezzdoit! Goodnight :)

It's been a while

since I sat down in a parking lot and had a long conversation with someone, but tonight I did just that with my good friend Jonathan Christian. I don't remember the last time I had a legitimate one-on-one conversation with him, but we talked for about two hours in front of the church after 1822. We talked about childhood memories, baseball/softball moments, insecurities, food, old television shows, plans for the future... the whole nine yards. I'm so glad I got to catch up with Jonathan; I'd missed him :)

For those who are curious about my day leading up to then, this is for you: A good portion of internship today was spend shopping for and organizing snacks and drinks for choir tour!

{Photo cred: Joni!}

Woop woop! BJ's loved us :) This shopping trip was a fun time, and we certainly got some pretty awesome looks! Today was a verse-check day, and I am happy to report that I didn't mess up a single word! Praise! I came home for a short while after that before going on a lovely dinner date with Heather :) We had some delicious sushi, and we even got to talk for a little bit in the parking lot after :) I love my Heather :) She always brings a smile to my face and we always manage to laugh at ourselves in one way or another :) Also, she pointed out that I do this thing when I talk where I kind of flap my forearms up and down in front of me. I've never really noticed it before, but if you see me doing it, please bring it to my attention! Haha :) From there I went to 1822, which was good. Philip did acoustic worship tonight, and I really liked it. It wasn't overwhelming or obscenely loud; it was just.... nice :) Jonathan Blair picked me up and almost put me in a trashcan afterwards, but he failed. Had he succeeded, I would have been a not-so-happy camper, haha. But yes, from there I had my parking lot chat :) All in all, today was pretty swell. I love you all! Goodnight :)

Teen Wolf, cheering tryouts, and choir tour stokedness!

Today was a pretty lazy day up until the early evening. My afternoon was spent watching America's Next Top Model and Teen Wolf. Oh, and I worked on my memory verses, of course. But yes, I actually like Teen Wolf. Yes, I made fun of the trailer when I first saw it and let out an "Oh no..." but it's surprisingly entertaining!

I had to pull myself off the comfy couch to help with Brookland cheering tryouts from 4-6. And from this experience, I learned a little something about myself: I am not super tolerant of incompetence. Or rather, I have little patience for individuals whom I teach something to over and over again, they claim they know it, say they don't have any questions about the material, and then can't do it at all when you try to watch them. I think I ended up sounding a tad frustrated (which I was) by the time it was all said and done, and some of them probably think I was mean or intimidating. I didn't want to come off that way, but they just stressed me out. Needless to say, I was relieved to be able to leave and go have dinner at my dad's house. The time to sit and relax was much needed and appreciated.

Something I was excited for this evening was the leader meeting for choir tour! Woop woop! I still can't believe we're leaving in [technically] 3 days! Eeeeeep :) We went over job assignments, itinerary, transportation assignments, counting groups, hotel rooms, etc. All exciting stuff, in my opinion :) And although I really noticed just how busy we're going to be throughout this whole endeavor, I know it's going to be an awesome time :) Eeeeeep! 3 days! 3 days! 3 days!

After some street convo outside of Joni's house with Christian, Kathryn, Mac, and Adam (and Joni popped in for a bit), Kathryn, Elsbeth, and I hung out to watch the new Teen Wolf :) It was suspenseful! And now I'm left wondering what on earth is going to happen next week! Hopefully it'll be on On Demand for when I come home! Haha. But yes, I thoroughly getting to hang out with those two loves :) And I'm also very happy that Elsbeth is home! I know she was only on vacation for a short while, but I certainly missed her :)

Well loves, I really need to sleep. The alarm sounds in 6 short hours. Goodnight!

Just found my old memory card!

This is what was was left on it:

 Candice and I! I do like this picture :) And I just wanted to point out that I am wearing 1) Osiris skater shoes (which I thought were SO cool!) and 2) a t-shirt my friend Ivy made me that says "I <3 rolling backpacks." Hahaha, yessss!

 Cousins! April and Molly :) April actually just graduated this past week, and Molly is about to be a sophomore. Crazy!

 Molly! I thought this was so artsy when I took it :)

 Candice and Justin.... when they were still dating.... Okay moving on! Haha.

 Myspace pic anyone? Haha. And if you're wondering about the outfit, that was my dance uniform that year for competition hip hop. It's snazzy, I know. Hilda knew how to pick 'em ;)

This was my Myspace profile pic for quite some time, haha. I liked that it looked like my hair was straightened, but I didn't actually own a straightener (I was late on getting one). Haha. And that American Eagle shirt was probably my favorite. I wore it all the time :)

Haha, so old! That last picture was taken January 20, 2006. Dang!

I thought there would be more on there, but I suppose the memory was so low I had gotten in the habit of deleting things. Well, I just thought I'd share those :)

#555

So I almost fell asleep just now, but then I remembered that I get concerned wall posts if I don't blog... Haha. That humors me :)

Church was the usual. Help set up for preschool before going to middle school sunday school. I led a group of boys today... They were a bit rowdy and chit-chatty, but they weren't too bad I suppose. I will admit though, it was much more challenging than being with the girls I'm normally with. MUCH more. Service was good as well. I was so stoked that Anthony and Nikki were leading worship, you have no idea! It had been far too long; I'd missed them singing! After church, I went to Annemarie's graduation party :) I got to see some lovely friends, and enjoy some yummy breakfast food! Oh, and I also got a little thing of bubbles, which made me very happy. It's funny, you give a college kid bubbles, and they might as well be a 5 year old child, haha. But anyways, I made a trip to Walmart with Nikki and Juliana before going back to Annemarie's shin-dig, getting my car, and heading home. I got to take about an hour-long nap before going to my padre's for dinner. Tacos=yum! I left a little early so I could make it to the end of Zach's birthday get-together, and I literally got there after everyone had eaten and everything, haha. But I got to talk and hangout with everyone for a bit, so that was nice :) And all the while, I was blowing bubbles, haha. What? They amuse me :) There was no hangout planned for tonight, so I decided just to come on home. I went on a bit of a run/walk around 9:30. It's random, because I don't usually run..... ever. But sometimes I just get in this mood where I want to. After coming home and laying in my floor for a little while, I finally got myself ready for bed. I just did some reading that I have to do for internship, and I'm realizing how far behind I am. I'm on page 55 of 275, and we're supposed to have it finished by the 21st. Yikes. Pray for me in getting that done, please. Haha. That's going to be rough!

In my down time, I often ponder the motivation behind my wants/thought processes. (I'm not sure if I mentioned that on here before.) These days, I fear that my motivations come from feelings/emotions that are not acceptable, at least in my book. It's weird, because you would think that one would be okay with themselves as long as they aren't acting on thoughts or emotions that are considered "bad," but the truth is that your thoughts aren't fleeting, like actions. If anything, they resonate within us for periods of time that feel like eternity. You can't just stop thinking about something, because the harder you try, the more you think about it! (Crazy cycle...) More importantly though, God knows our thoughts, and He knows the impure nature of them when applicable. Purity of mind is probably one of the hardest things to achieve, if I'm being honest. I have yet to meet a person who has never had a negative thought about something/someone/themselves. It leads me to wonder if it's even possible to have a pure mind, but it has to be. Though certainly it would be extremely difficult for us, God makes all things possible...

"But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people."

{Ephesians 5:3}

”Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.'”
{Matthew 19:26}

Well, I am extremely tired now. Goodnight loves! Sleep well :)

"I'm not a girl..."

"...not yet a woman!" :D

Oh today :) After waking up and getting ready, I got to get lunch with Hannah, Stephanie, and Nicole (SAO loves!). Taylor was supposed to come too, but she didn't get into Richmond as early as we thought :/ Lunch was still very good though! I love that the four of us got to get together :) After driving home, Stephanie and Hannah departed, and I headed over to Heather's :) Yes, we had a pool date :) Not only did I get to enjoy her always lovely company, but I also got to tan. Yay, tan lines! And yay sunburn? Haha. It's okay, it's not that bad :) When it was time for Heather and I to go our separate ways, I drove over to my cousin April's graduation party. I played some cards, ate some food, mingled with some people--things of that nature. It was a nice, relaxing time :) Sure, I had to drive home in a downpour, but Candice was in the car with me so I felt a little less anxious, haha. We didn't jam out to Britney music the whole way home... nope :) As for my night, I currently have my darling Kelly spending the night with me :) We tried to find Crossroads at Target, but it wasn't there. Thus, we rented it off Amazon and watched it on Kelly's computer. It was kind of hard to hear, so here's what we did....

Hahahaha. Ghetto? Maybe. But that's okay :) I love that movie. (And for those who were wondering, the title of this post is one of her songs that she sings in the movie. Haha.) I think I might be on a hardcore Britney Spears kick right now.... Is that okay? I sure hope so! :) And now? Well, Kelly is cuddling with a box of tissues and getting ready to sleep.

I need to follow suit. Church comes early! Goodnight all!

It's Friday, Friday!

My mom calls that "the calendar song," hahaha!

Today was good! I took my time getting ready for the day, and Kelly came over around 1:30 or so :) I made her some hot tea for her poor throat, and she drank that while I ate my lunch. We watched Burlesque! She had never seen it, so it was a must :) She thought it was kind of cheesy, but I think she enjoyed it nonetheless!

Hannah got here around 4:30! Yay for minute-long hugs! Haha. It was so lovely to see her :) We were only at the house for a little while before we went to 1) pick up my dinner from Tokyo Sushi and 2) go to Sweet Frog :) I ate my dinner once I got home because I wanted to make sure Hannah could get to her meeting for the D.R. on time. I don't think my mom has ever eaten sushi before, because she was completely amazed that I stuck a whole piece in my mouth at one time.... Hahaha. Oh, madre! She still doesn't believe that middle child syndrome is real. It is though, and I told her so. Haha.

Juliana made cheering!!!! YAY! I was so excited for her when she told me on the phone :D For celebration, she was going to float night at the pool and asked me to join her. So, of course, I did! It was fun :) We swam for a bit and even did some swinging :) I love that girl, so much!

Once Hannah got back from her meeting, we went to Applebee's to be her some food! Twas good :) Good convo and good company; gotta love it! We also got to jam out to my new Britney Spears mix CD while we were in the car, which was great :) For those who want to see that playlist, here it is!

Okay, it's bedtime :) I love you all! Goodnight!

"We won't sing this song for choir tour iPod karaoke..."

No really, we won't. Hahaha. No way Joni would let that fly!  Bahahaha, what if???

The interns were blessed with Starbucks beverages upon our arrival this morning! That gesture was seriously so kind and much appreciated! I led the devotion this morning, which thankfully went very well. I was glad that we were all able to have a discussion period and throw out opinions/personal experiences.

^"9 This is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance. ¹⁰That is why we labor and strive, because we have put our hope in the living God, who is the Savior of all people, and especially of those who believe.

 ¹¹ Command and teach these things. ¹² Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity."

{1 Timothy 4:9-12}

Being so young can be hard, especially you are working somewhere where those older than you also have much more experience. But God has blessed the interns with this amazing opportunity for a reason. Just as we have much to learn from our church leaders, we have our own passions, services, etc. to offer. And even though, as I shared this morning, it can be awfully intimidating to take on a leadership role when 1) other people have been youth leaders longer and 2) you are only one year removed from the youth group, God has plans to use us and work through us. Our age is not our determining factor in our abilities or adequacy, but rather our heart and lifestyle. You are never too young to model Christ, and you can pour into others at any age :)

My day's work? Well, I made over 3,000 pages worth of copies. Oh yeah, me and that machine are well acquainted now. But it wasn't too bad. Luckily I had Jamal to keep me company :) After talking to Ashlyn for a bit, I had a dinner date with Annemarie :) She took me to 821 Cafe, and it was delicious! I had never tried it before, but I do believe I shall be returning there in the future. It definitely has that Richmond vibe, if you know what I mean.

I also got to spend some time with my darling little love, Juliana :) I gave her some pointers for her cheering tryouts tomorrow, which didn't take long at all. She just takes direction so well! I literally gave her a note about her jumps, she immediately applied it, and her toe-touch almost doubled in height. My jaw dropped, I'm just saying. Once she was satisfied with her review and I gave her all the notes I could think of, we hit up the hot tub :) Oh, and we had popsicles, haha. We also got to enjoy the company of her mom as we conversed. Can I just say, I love that I can hang out with a 7th grader and have a completely wonderful time :) I love my Juliana! (P.S.- send prayers her way! Her tryouts are today [Friday] after school! The list will be posted by 7 or 8!)

It was before 10 when I got home, and certainly wasn't going to stay in (it's just not natural for me). Thus, the lovely Kelly and myself went to swing at the park for a bit. We didn't stay too long though, because mosquitoes are always under some deranged impression that I'm a buffet or something. For those of you who may not know, I'm actually allergic to mosquito bites, so they swell up and for funny shapes and/or merge together. It's weird. But anyways, we then ventured to Cookout to grab Kelly a delicious shake :) All the while, we are jamming out to a lovely CD in the car, which included songs like: Oops I Did It Again, 2 Become 1 (hence the title), Bye Bye Bye, Wannabe, and Sometimes :) I loved it!

Oh.... I just ran into this commercial on Youtube!

Hahahahaha! I laugh every time :)

In other news, Taylor Swift won Video of the Year at the CMT Awards for "Mine"!

I love Taylor! I always will. Here are just a few other reasons why:



Okay I'll stop now :) I love you all! Goodnight!

In today's news:

• My cousin April graduated high school! 
• I got to see her get her diploma, which was cool :)
• I did some much needed grocery shopping.
• I am officially re-stocked in the Nutella and Arizona green tea department :)
• While watching an America's Next Top Model marathon, I fell into a lovely slumber.
• It was the season when McKey won (11th cycle).
• That was a sweet, sweet nap (probs about 2 hours long).
• My padre made BBQ for dinner tonight; twas yummy!
• I wasn't able to go to the ceremony, but my little sister got inducted into the NAtional Honors Society tonight! I am so proud of her!!!
• Youth group tonight was wonderful :)
• I loved the dancing and jumping around for Jesus :) So fun!
• Even though I was nervous, I liked being able to lead prayer time :)
• People were very encouraging; thanks for that :)
• Nikki's start to the Old Testament series was very good :) I'm glad I got to listen in.
• After hanging out in the youth office for quite some time, Kelly, Elsbeth, Heather and I made a 7-11 run before going to Elsbeth's to watch "Better Off Dead." 
• Oh 80s movies, you are quite humorous :)
• I took Heather back to her car before driving home.
• I made a pit-stop for gas on the way.
• I'm becoming infamous for making midnight gas station trips. Sketchy.

I had almost forgotten that tomorrow was my day to lead devotions for internship! Luckily, I already kind of had something in mind, so I'm good :)

Something has kind of been on my mind the past few days, and it somewhat troubles me. I'm kind of anxious about going back to school. It's not that I don't want to go back, because believe me there I people I will be very excited to see. But I'm just so happy with where I am right now and with what I'm doing. I'm surrounded by people whom I love dearly, and I'm working in a place I love so much I consider it home. Being away from all of that is hard for me, really hard. It's not just that though, I'm honestly afraid that I will annoy my friends at school. I mean, I've had that fear for a while, but still. I'm just waiting for the day that they get tired of me trying to hang out with them all the time. If I can be honest, one of my biggest fears is being rejected. Perhaps I'm being slightly irrational, and I should probably give my school friends more credit than what I am. I'm just a little worried, you know? Well, fortunately I have another two and a half months to cope with/handle that. For now, it is time for bed! Goodnight all :)

Why is it

that whenever I have a serious thought I want to express, I feel the need to be cryptic? Perhaps it's because I'm too scared to throw some things out there, for one reason or another. I could tell you what I'm really pondering over, or how I do and don't feel, but that just seems so pensive in a way that I'm not sure anyone would really appreciate. I had thought about typing a tidbit involving "muted gavels" and "deafening deceptions," but in all honesty it just didn't seem natural. And if I'm being honest, there wouldn't be any real beneficiaries from such spurts. I think it's rather interesting how carefully words are considered when you publish them in an informal fashion, even despite the fact that they can be easily deleted at any time. The concern of others is always a primary concern, as is the fear of others being concerned in reciprocation. I'll tell you something I find funny, and it is that I started going on this tangent about not wanting to be terribly cryptic but ended up spewing about things that probably make no sense whatsoever. Interesting how that worked out, huh?

For those who take interest in the festivities of my daily life, here it is!

• Internship.
• Got to enjoy breakfast pizza.
• Formed a new inside joke.
• Started making choir tour videos!
• Didn't lose any money on memory verses!
• Nap time.
• Helped Juliana with her material for cheering tryouts.
• It's funny, I was watching her do one of the chants and instantly knew that Hermitage girls were running her tryouts. How did I know? Well, I kind of made up that particular chant. Haha! Twas humorous.
• Talked to Johnny for a spell.
• He thoroughly enjoyed the youth production last night.
• Showed up at the very end of 1822.
• Hung out for a little while at Elizabeth's with Kathryn and Kim.

I have to be up in a little over 6 hours. My cousin is graduating in the AM! Woop! Goodnight loves :)

Focus and "day passes"

Well, the final WEAG Focus performance was tonight, and it was absolutely amazing :) The music was moving, the dancing was impacting, the acting was on point, and the glory of God was definitely put on display through every moment of it :) All I can say is that I am so happy that it's not over yet! I am so stoked for choir tour I can't even tell you! I might be more excited than some of the kids that are going, if that tells you anything, haha! I know God has used and will continue to use each youth as a vessel through this show. Ahhhh! It's just so great! :D

"Sing to the LORD a new song, 
   for he has done marvelous things; 
his right hand and his holy arm 
   have worked salvation for him."
{Psalm 98:1}

P.S.- My mom came and saw the show again tonight! That just makes me really happy in that, even though I wasn't in it, she genuinely wanted to come and experience it :)

After the show, I got some dinner at Champs with Heather and Kelly. I do love them :) I love how much we can laugh and just be awkward together and have it still be okay. And I really love seeing Heather and/or Kelly laugh to the point where they are literally bent over in hysterics. Seeing that makes me extremely joyful inside :) It's probably one of my favorite things to witness, truthfully :) After that, I went to Elizabeth's for a spell. We had some talking time around the fire pit, which is always fun. New inside jokes have been sparked, specifically "deer" and "day passes." Haha. Don't worry about it :) All I will say, is that Elizabeth has already reserved her day pass to visit Mac and Daniel..... Hahahahaha :D

Well loves, I really need to go to bed. After coming home and showering, it was after 1 AM, and I had yet to memorize my scripture for internship this week. Well, after practicing for probably about 20 or 30 minutes, I think I have it enough to where it'll be review looking over it tomorrow. Wish me luck, though! Here's what I'm memorizing:

^"4 But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, ⁵ made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. ⁶ And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, ⁷ in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. ⁸ For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— ⁹ not by works, so that no one can boast. ¹⁰ For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."
{Ephesians 2:4-10}

Yep! There you have it. That'll be all for now :) Goodnight!

"Son of Man, Son of Righteousness..."

"...King of the Earth for sinner's slain."

Every time I hear the youth choir sing this song, I literally get goosebumps :) I absolutely love it! I love the tangible passion for the Lord, and I love getting to see my friends worship God with their talents :) Joni was right when she told us that it was a new experience watching the production as opposed to being on stage, but she was also right when she said it was so rewarding :) I am so happy where I'm at, and I absolutely love what I'm doing! Ahhhh! I just wish I could express to you how incredibly blessed I feel! I'm so happy :D

My whole day was basically spent at church :) The pancake breakfast went well, the services were lovely, the production was wonderful, and I always love having the opportunity to fellowship with my friends and other church members :) I'll tell you what, it still blows my mind that people remember who I am, haha! I should also mention how great it is that we were able to have the production tonight, because at 3:00 the power was out and they said it might be 3-4 hours until it came back on. But God is so faithful, and it was back on within about an hour! Praise be to Him! After selling shirts and hanging out for a bit after the show, I went to a very large hangout at Elizabeth's :) We watched the MTV movie awards, Kelly and I went on a Walmart/Cookout run, and we watched a movie called Breadcrumbs. (Five dollar movie bin at Walmart? I think yes!) But let me just say, this little girl who won the award for "Best Line From a Movie" was so cute! Look! (Her speech starts at 2:25.)

I love that she thanks God! Awww! I want to put that girl in my pocket! But alas, dear loves, I will spare you any further ranting and will bid thee adieu. Goodnight :)

"I'm ready for my blessing!"

... I love my Elsbeth :)

I got to visit two little girls today that I haven't seen in a very long time. One of them seems to be doing extremely well, while the other is not. It worries me a great deal, and a big part of me just wants to live with her for a while so that I can be a kind of "big sister" her. I just really think she needs someone older that she can talk to that isn't her parent (in the middle school age, nobody really wants to do that). Her and her family might be coming to the youth production tomorrow night, which I really hope they do! Maybe she'll want to get involved with youth group, and maybe it will help. I am going to be praying very hard about that tonight. The Lord has a plan, and I am going to have to trust in that and lift it all to Him!

I got to have a coffee date with Judy today :) It was nice to hang out and get to know her more. She is such a sweetheart, and I think we will definitely be getting together again :) From there it was straight to youth choir rehearsal. Let me say that I am SO EXCITED for the show tomorrow and monday! It's going to be so great! And, not even lying, there are multiple moments where I get goosebumps and am just left with an overwhelming sense of "proud mom" mixed with amazement. The emotion pours out from that stage, and there is such talent in the choir. I love watching it, and I'm so happy that I've been able to help out with it! Even if it's little things like making props for the backdrop, painting the risers, passing out tee shirts, writing notes in the script margins, or just sweeping the stage, I love that I was able to be of some assistance :)

Dinner at Chipotle was fun :) I love my friends, and I love that Stony Point is our go-to meal spot. I got to see and hang out with so many people! I love how much I can laugh around them, and I love that we can just talk and be totally content :)  After talking in the parking lot for a good while, I decided to come home. I caught my mom before she went to bed, and we actually ended up talking for probably about an hour. That doesn't normally happen, but it was good. We were able to talk about a lot of things, and even though the conversations were pretty serious, it was nice. She's coming to the show tomorrow! That makes me happy :) Did I mention I was excited? Haha.

And now it is after 1 AM... I have to be at church in less than 6 hours. That being said, goodnight all!

"The wind is a pervert."

Today was truly splendid :) Kelly picked me up and treated my to a lovely lunch at California Pizza Kitchen, which was absolutely delightful :) We then proceeded to walk around the mall for a bit before heading home. On the ride back, we had a jam sesh to this song:

Haha, throwback much?! We also belted out the words (some incorrect) to "Just the Way You Are," haha. Everybody be on the lookout, Kelly and I are about to start our music careers..... Yeah, no. Haha. After poking around the house for a bit, it was time for Heather's birthday dinner at Maggiano's! We got to sit outside on the shaded patio, and it was so lovely!

I'm so glad I got to treat my dear Heather on her birthday :) Twas a fantastic time! She had to leave while I was waiting for the check to go to rehearsal, but I realized I still needed to give her something. So I go to the church, and Heather's actually pulling in right behind me. So I get really excited and jump out of my car to meet her, and only after walking inside for a bit and going to leave did I realize that I locked my keys in my car..... Yeah, I had to be downtown in less than 45 minutes. I was going to have a friend break into my car for me, but then I just decided it would be better to wait for my mom to bring me the spare key. And with less than 30 minutes to make it to my destination, I sped off!

Miraculously, I made it to the CFA Senior Dance Showcase with time to spare! Oh my goodness, those girls did such an amazing job of choreographing those pieces! I was blown away; not a single piece was remotely shabby. Each of them was full of emotions and just amazing to watch. My darling Sarah's piece turned out so well! I am so proud of her! (She was my dancer for my piece last year.) My little love is going to do so well at Shenandoah next year, I just know it! My little brother, Rave', was amazing as always! His talent never ceases to amaze me. His hugs are pretty wonderful too, I must say :) Ahh! I love him :) And my friend Jessica did so well too! Some of you may recall me mentioning how I have those "proud mom" moments... Yeah, this was one of them. It also really made me miss dancing. I constantly wonder about what I can't do anymore or how awful I'd be if I tried to jump back into one of my old dance classes. It's all just so beautiful and expressive! I don't want to lose that, ever...

I made it to the last 10 minutes or so of youth choir rehearsal; thus there wasn't much to do. But, like I've said a million times, I love being involved with the youth. I love being able to help, and I love that they will actually come to me when something's on their mind. I love them, so much! From there, it was over to Elizabeth's! Three people rode inside while seven people rode in the back of a pickup truck to go to Krispy Kreme to get free donuts (National Donut Day). Let me just say, the wind chill made the trip almost not even worth it! SO COLD! Also not that I was wearing a dress. Take that fact and combine it with the quote that is the title of this post, and I think you'll figure out why I was having issues, haha. We had some bonfire time as we threw marshmallows at one another, and I closed my evening with a skype date to some of my sisters at the SAO convention in New Mexico.

Yep, today's been good. I'm sleepy now, though, so I am going to bid the adieu. Goodnight loves!

Happy Birthday,

to my wonderfully amazing best friend, Heather :)

I find it so hard to believe that we've really only been friends for about 14 months, and it astounds me (in a good way, of course!) how close we've become! You always have sound advice for me, and you call me back in the middle of the night even when I wake you up with desperate phone calls. You tolerate my dry sarcasm and aren't afraid to dish it back out to me. You still put up a fight when it comes to checks, and we will forever be an indecisive pair ;) Your hugs are basically the greatest thing ever, and you never fail to make my day brighter :) I love you so incredibly much! You always roll your eyes and ask "What am I going to do with you?!" Well, my darling, just keep doing what you're doing, because you are honestly one of the greatest blessings I have in my life :) Thank you for everything, and I hope your 18th birthday is everything you hoped it would be :) You deserve all of the joy in the world, and I will say it again: I love you :) More! The end!

You make my heart smile :)

Our world could be much more utopian

if everyone had more positive things to say. I've been thinking about how negative comments can affect a person, and it truly is offensive and hurtful. Just something I was thinking about tonight....

Today was incredibly long, and it looked a little something like this:

• Internship 9-4.
• Take a 30 minute nap at home.
• Scarf down dinner.
• Youth choir rehearsal 6:30-9.
• Swings and Krispy Kreme with Kelly :)

I am extremely tired, and tomorrow is sure to be a fun one :) But you'll hear about that later. Bye all!

"You are good, You are good..."

"...when there's nothing good in me."

This song really hit me tonight in youth group, this line in particular. So often, there are things about us (whether it be our thoughts, actions, or emotions) that are not good; they are rooted in a dark place, and there is no denying it. As long as we are sinners, which we all are, there will be at least a drop of darkness within us. But, by decided to worship and truly follow Jesus, that darkness can be eclipsed by the light He pours into us; the light that bursts through the pores of those who are on fire for Him; the essence of the Spirit at work in us. Even when we are not good, He will forever be. Because of that, we can stand firm in our Lord and take hold of His righteous hand when we go astray. He is constant; we are never left or forsaken by Him. "My heat will sing no other name, Jesus."

Yet another amazing song from tonight:

No matter how much effort I put forth, I cannot create a concrete image of Heaven in my head. And obviously no one here on earth knows what Heaven will be like, but I can't even create up a picture of what I think it will look or be like. But the promise of no more suffering, no more violence, no more sickness, no weeping, no darkness, no pain... How marvelous will that be :) We will not be bound by physical or earthly limits. Why would you not want to worship a God who promises such things to those who love Him? It will be wonderful when I can literally be held by my Father, when my time comes :) Maybe He'll let me dance with Him in the streets paved with gold :) I don't know what's in store, but I know that He will always be enough, always :) Despite what the world may throw at me, I can always take comfort in my Savior, for He has relieved us of our transgressions and has promised us eternal life in His kingdom, forever in His presence.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
{John 16:33}

He has overcome every hardship we have/are/will endure[d][ing], and He walks with us every step of the way. God humbles Himself for our sake.

"The God who came to earth came not in a raging whirlwind nor in a devouring fire. Unimaginably, the Maker of all things shrank down, down, down, so small as to become an ovum, a single fertilized egg barely visible to the naked eye, an egg that would divide and redivide until a fetus took shape, enlarging cell by cell inside a nervous teenager." -Philip Yancey, "The Jesus I Never Knew" (p. 36)

How wonderful our God is that He would humble Himself before us in such a way. Just take a moment and imagine God's thoughts as He sent Jesus to the earth, so tiny and fragile, to grow and be taken care of by a young teenage Mary. He loved us enough to do that! And He continues to shower us with mercy, love, and grace. We are truly blessed :) We should worship our Father joyfully and with thanksgiving!

^"1 Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth. ² Worship the LORD with gladness;
   come before him with joyful songs. ³ Know that the LORD is God.
   It is he who made us, and we are his^[a];
   we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

⁴ Enter his gates with thanksgiving
   and his courts with praise;
   give thanks to him and praise his name. ⁵ For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
   his faithfulness continues through all generations."

{Psalm 100}

Goodnight, precious loves :) Sleep well.

Exhausted.

Although today was long, at least I can say I enjoyed myself. But I'm to the point right now where I basically only talk in monotone and I have a mild headache that's been lingering for the past 5 hours or so. Thus, this is going to be short (by my standards) and sweet. Ready, go!

Internship was the usual 9-4. I didn't lose any money on my memory verses; praise. As far as tasks are concerned, we arranged and painted the riser platforms, added cross-beams for support, and swept the stage for the youth production. I went straight from there to Hermitage to run cheering tryouts. It went a lot better than I had anticipated, which I'm glad about. The girls were very attentive, and they were definitely working hard. We got through the cheer and both chants today, but we didn't even get to start on the dance. Thus, tomorrow is going to be a rough day for them. That dance is over eight 8-counts long; be praying for them... I left there around 6 and headed right back to church. After snagging Joni, Devin, and myself pizza from 1822 (praise the Lord for those free meals!), the interns did various tasks to help out during the choir rehearsal. A little set tweaking, some note-taking, input on blocking, and helping the choir all sway in the same direction (cough cough, boys) haha! At 9 we headed up to see people once 1822 was over, and a bunch of us went to the traditional spot, Boyers. I tried the zero calorie XXX Vitmain Water; it was weird. I don't think I'd recommend it. But anyways, we enjoyed some lovely conversation outside before calling it a night. I would have loved to have hung out, but I told Elizabeth that I knew I wouldn't be a lot of fun. Haha, seriously, I am dunzo. I was lugging my 3 bags of stuff (hands full) up to my front door, and when I found out the door was locked, I almost cried. Haha, that is how tired I am! But it is all good, because I get to sleep in tomorrow and the Lord will surely bless me with superb rest and strength for the day that lies ahead :) Goodnight all!