#555

So I almost fell asleep just now, but then I remembered that I get concerned wall posts if I don't blog... Haha. That humors me :)

Church was the usual. Help set up for preschool before going to middle school sunday school. I led a group of boys today... They were a bit rowdy and chit-chatty, but they weren't too bad I suppose. I will admit though, it was much more challenging than being with the girls I'm normally with. MUCH more. Service was good as well. I was so stoked that Anthony and Nikki were leading worship, you have no idea! It had been far too long; I'd missed them singing! After church, I went to Annemarie's graduation party :) I got to see some lovely friends, and enjoy some yummy breakfast food! Oh, and I also got a little thing of bubbles, which made me very happy. It's funny, you give a college kid bubbles, and they might as well be a 5 year old child, haha. But anyways, I made a trip to Walmart with Nikki and Juliana before going back to Annemarie's shin-dig, getting my car, and heading home. I got to take about an hour-long nap before going to my padre's for dinner. Tacos=yum! I left a little early so I could make it to the end of Zach's birthday get-together, and I literally got there after everyone had eaten and everything, haha. But I got to talk and hangout with everyone for a bit, so that was nice :) And all the while, I was blowing bubbles, haha. What? They amuse me :) There was no hangout planned for tonight, so I decided just to come on home. I went on a bit of a run/walk around 9:30. It's random, because I don't usually run..... ever. But sometimes I just get in this mood where I want to. After coming home and laying in my floor for a little while, I finally got myself ready for bed. I just did some reading that I have to do for internship, and I'm realizing how far behind I am. I'm on page 55 of 275, and we're supposed to have it finished by the 21st. Yikes. Pray for me in getting that done, please. Haha. That's going to be rough!

In my down time, I often ponder the motivation behind my wants/thought processes. (I'm not sure if I mentioned that on here before.) These days, I fear that my motivations come from feelings/emotions that are not acceptable, at least in my book. It's weird, because you would think that one would be okay with themselves as long as they aren't acting on thoughts or emotions that are considered "bad," but the truth is that your thoughts aren't fleeting, like actions. If anything, they resonate within us for periods of time that feel like eternity. You can't just stop thinking about something, because the harder you try, the more you think about it! (Crazy cycle...) More importantly though, God knows our thoughts, and He knows the impure nature of them when applicable. Purity of mind is probably one of the hardest things to achieve, if I'm being honest. I have yet to meet a person who has never had a negative thought about something/someone/themselves. It leads me to wonder if it's even possible to have a pure mind, but it has to be. Though certainly it would be extremely difficult for us, God makes all things possible...

"But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people."

{Ephesians 5:3}

”Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.'”
{Matthew 19:26}

Well, I am extremely tired now. Goodnight loves! Sleep well :)

"I'm not a girl..."

"...not yet a woman!" :D

Oh today :) After waking up and getting ready, I got to get lunch with Hannah, Stephanie, and Nicole (SAO loves!). Taylor was supposed to come too, but she didn't get into Richmond as early as we thought :/ Lunch was still very good though! I love that the four of us got to get together :) After driving home, Stephanie and Hannah departed, and I headed over to Heather's :) Yes, we had a pool date :) Not only did I get to enjoy her always lovely company, but I also got to tan. Yay, tan lines! And yay sunburn? Haha. It's okay, it's not that bad :) When it was time for Heather and I to go our separate ways, I drove over to my cousin April's graduation party. I played some cards, ate some food, mingled with some people--things of that nature. It was a nice, relaxing time :) Sure, I had to drive home in a downpour, but Candice was in the car with me so I felt a little less anxious, haha. We didn't jam out to Britney music the whole way home... nope :) As for my night, I currently have my darling Kelly spending the night with me :) We tried to find Crossroads at Target, but it wasn't there. Thus, we rented it off Amazon and watched it on Kelly's computer. It was kind of hard to hear, so here's what we did....

Hahahaha. Ghetto? Maybe. But that's okay :) I love that movie. (And for those who were wondering, the title of this post is one of her songs that she sings in the movie. Haha.) I think I might be on a hardcore Britney Spears kick right now.... Is that okay? I sure hope so! :) And now? Well, Kelly is cuddling with a box of tissues and getting ready to sleep.

I need to follow suit. Church comes early! Goodnight all!

It's Friday, Friday!

My mom calls that "the calendar song," hahaha!

Today was good! I took my time getting ready for the day, and Kelly came over around 1:30 or so :) I made her some hot tea for her poor throat, and she drank that while I ate my lunch. We watched Burlesque! She had never seen it, so it was a must :) She thought it was kind of cheesy, but I think she enjoyed it nonetheless!

Hannah got here around 4:30! Yay for minute-long hugs! Haha. It was so lovely to see her :) We were only at the house for a little while before we went to 1) pick up my dinner from Tokyo Sushi and 2) go to Sweet Frog :) I ate my dinner once I got home because I wanted to make sure Hannah could get to her meeting for the D.R. on time. I don't think my mom has ever eaten sushi before, because she was completely amazed that I stuck a whole piece in my mouth at one time.... Hahaha. Oh, madre! She still doesn't believe that middle child syndrome is real. It is though, and I told her so. Haha.

Juliana made cheering!!!! YAY! I was so excited for her when she told me on the phone :D For celebration, she was going to float night at the pool and asked me to join her. So, of course, I did! It was fun :) We swam for a bit and even did some swinging :) I love that girl, so much!

Once Hannah got back from her meeting, we went to Applebee's to be her some food! Twas good :) Good convo and good company; gotta love it! We also got to jam out to my new Britney Spears mix CD while we were in the car, which was great :) For those who want to see that playlist, here it is!

Okay, it's bedtime :) I love you all! Goodnight!

"We won't sing this song for choir tour iPod karaoke..."

No really, we won't. Hahaha. No way Joni would let that fly!  Bahahaha, what if???

The interns were blessed with Starbucks beverages upon our arrival this morning! That gesture was seriously so kind and much appreciated! I led the devotion this morning, which thankfully went very well. I was glad that we were all able to have a discussion period and throw out opinions/personal experiences.

^"9 This is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance. ¹⁰That is why we labor and strive, because we have put our hope in the living God, who is the Savior of all people, and especially of those who believe.

 ¹¹ Command and teach these things. ¹² Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity."

{1 Timothy 4:9-12}

Being so young can be hard, especially you are working somewhere where those older than you also have much more experience. But God has blessed the interns with this amazing opportunity for a reason. Just as we have much to learn from our church leaders, we have our own passions, services, etc. to offer. And even though, as I shared this morning, it can be awfully intimidating to take on a leadership role when 1) other people have been youth leaders longer and 2) you are only one year removed from the youth group, God has plans to use us and work through us. Our age is not our determining factor in our abilities or adequacy, but rather our heart and lifestyle. You are never too young to model Christ, and you can pour into others at any age :)

My day's work? Well, I made over 3,000 pages worth of copies. Oh yeah, me and that machine are well acquainted now. But it wasn't too bad. Luckily I had Jamal to keep me company :) After talking to Ashlyn for a bit, I had a dinner date with Annemarie :) She took me to 821 Cafe, and it was delicious! I had never tried it before, but I do believe I shall be returning there in the future. It definitely has that Richmond vibe, if you know what I mean.

I also got to spend some time with my darling little love, Juliana :) I gave her some pointers for her cheering tryouts tomorrow, which didn't take long at all. She just takes direction so well! I literally gave her a note about her jumps, she immediately applied it, and her toe-touch almost doubled in height. My jaw dropped, I'm just saying. Once she was satisfied with her review and I gave her all the notes I could think of, we hit up the hot tub :) Oh, and we had popsicles, haha. We also got to enjoy the company of her mom as we conversed. Can I just say, I love that I can hang out with a 7th grader and have a completely wonderful time :) I love my Juliana! (P.S.- send prayers her way! Her tryouts are today [Friday] after school! The list will be posted by 7 or 8!)

It was before 10 when I got home, and certainly wasn't going to stay in (it's just not natural for me). Thus, the lovely Kelly and myself went to swing at the park for a bit. We didn't stay too long though, because mosquitoes are always under some deranged impression that I'm a buffet or something. For those of you who may not know, I'm actually allergic to mosquito bites, so they swell up and for funny shapes and/or merge together. It's weird. But anyways, we then ventured to Cookout to grab Kelly a delicious shake :) All the while, we are jamming out to a lovely CD in the car, which included songs like: Oops I Did It Again, 2 Become 1 (hence the title), Bye Bye Bye, Wannabe, and Sometimes :) I loved it!

Oh.... I just ran into this commercial on Youtube!

Hahahahaha! I laugh every time :)

In other news, Taylor Swift won Video of the Year at the CMT Awards for "Mine"!

I love Taylor! I always will. Here are just a few other reasons why:



Okay I'll stop now :) I love you all! Goodnight!

In today's news:

• My cousin April graduated high school! 
• I got to see her get her diploma, which was cool :)
• I did some much needed grocery shopping.
• I am officially re-stocked in the Nutella and Arizona green tea department :)
• While watching an America's Next Top Model marathon, I fell into a lovely slumber.
• It was the season when McKey won (11th cycle).
• That was a sweet, sweet nap (probs about 2 hours long).
• My padre made BBQ for dinner tonight; twas yummy!
• I wasn't able to go to the ceremony, but my little sister got inducted into the NAtional Honors Society tonight! I am so proud of her!!!
• Youth group tonight was wonderful :)
• I loved the dancing and jumping around for Jesus :) So fun!
• Even though I was nervous, I liked being able to lead prayer time :)
• People were very encouraging; thanks for that :)
• Nikki's start to the Old Testament series was very good :) I'm glad I got to listen in.
• After hanging out in the youth office for quite some time, Kelly, Elsbeth, Heather and I made a 7-11 run before going to Elsbeth's to watch "Better Off Dead." 
• Oh 80s movies, you are quite humorous :)
• I took Heather back to her car before driving home.
• I made a pit-stop for gas on the way.
• I'm becoming infamous for making midnight gas station trips. Sketchy.

I had almost forgotten that tomorrow was my day to lead devotions for internship! Luckily, I already kind of had something in mind, so I'm good :)

Something has kind of been on my mind the past few days, and it somewhat troubles me. I'm kind of anxious about going back to school. It's not that I don't want to go back, because believe me there I people I will be very excited to see. But I'm just so happy with where I am right now and with what I'm doing. I'm surrounded by people whom I love dearly, and I'm working in a place I love so much I consider it home. Being away from all of that is hard for me, really hard. It's not just that though, I'm honestly afraid that I will annoy my friends at school. I mean, I've had that fear for a while, but still. I'm just waiting for the day that they get tired of me trying to hang out with them all the time. If I can be honest, one of my biggest fears is being rejected. Perhaps I'm being slightly irrational, and I should probably give my school friends more credit than what I am. I'm just a little worried, you know? Well, fortunately I have another two and a half months to cope with/handle that. For now, it is time for bed! Goodnight all :)

Why is it

that whenever I have a serious thought I want to express, I feel the need to be cryptic? Perhaps it's because I'm too scared to throw some things out there, for one reason or another. I could tell you what I'm really pondering over, or how I do and don't feel, but that just seems so pensive in a way that I'm not sure anyone would really appreciate. I had thought about typing a tidbit involving "muted gavels" and "deafening deceptions," but in all honesty it just didn't seem natural. And if I'm being honest, there wouldn't be any real beneficiaries from such spurts. I think it's rather interesting how carefully words are considered when you publish them in an informal fashion, even despite the fact that they can be easily deleted at any time. The concern of others is always a primary concern, as is the fear of others being concerned in reciprocation. I'll tell you something I find funny, and it is that I started going on this tangent about not wanting to be terribly cryptic but ended up spewing about things that probably make no sense whatsoever. Interesting how that worked out, huh?

For those who take interest in the festivities of my daily life, here it is!

• Internship.
• Got to enjoy breakfast pizza.
• Formed a new inside joke.
• Started making choir tour videos!
• Didn't lose any money on memory verses!
• Nap time.
• Helped Juliana with her material for cheering tryouts.
• It's funny, I was watching her do one of the chants and instantly knew that Hermitage girls were running her tryouts. How did I know? Well, I kind of made up that particular chant. Haha! Twas humorous.
• Talked to Johnny for a spell.
• He thoroughly enjoyed the youth production last night.
• Showed up at the very end of 1822.
• Hung out for a little while at Elizabeth's with Kathryn and Kim.

I have to be up in a little over 6 hours. My cousin is graduating in the AM! Woop! Goodnight loves :)

Focus and "day passes"

Well, the final WEAG Focus performance was tonight, and it was absolutely amazing :) The music was moving, the dancing was impacting, the acting was on point, and the glory of God was definitely put on display through every moment of it :) All I can say is that I am so happy that it's not over yet! I am so stoked for choir tour I can't even tell you! I might be more excited than some of the kids that are going, if that tells you anything, haha! I know God has used and will continue to use each youth as a vessel through this show. Ahhhh! It's just so great! :D

"Sing to the LORD a new song, 
   for he has done marvelous things; 
his right hand and his holy arm 
   have worked salvation for him."
{Psalm 98:1}

P.S.- My mom came and saw the show again tonight! That just makes me really happy in that, even though I wasn't in it, she genuinely wanted to come and experience it :)

After the show, I got some dinner at Champs with Heather and Kelly. I do love them :) I love how much we can laugh and just be awkward together and have it still be okay. And I really love seeing Heather and/or Kelly laugh to the point where they are literally bent over in hysterics. Seeing that makes me extremely joyful inside :) It's probably one of my favorite things to witness, truthfully :) After that, I went to Elizabeth's for a spell. We had some talking time around the fire pit, which is always fun. New inside jokes have been sparked, specifically "deer" and "day passes." Haha. Don't worry about it :) All I will say, is that Elizabeth has already reserved her day pass to visit Mac and Daniel..... Hahahahaha :D

Well loves, I really need to go to bed. After coming home and showering, it was after 1 AM, and I had yet to memorize my scripture for internship this week. Well, after practicing for probably about 20 or 30 minutes, I think I have it enough to where it'll be review looking over it tomorrow. Wish me luck, though! Here's what I'm memorizing:

^"4 But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, ⁵ made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. ⁶ And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, ⁷ in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. ⁸ For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— ⁹ not by works, so that no one can boast. ¹⁰ For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."
{Ephesians 2:4-10}

Yep! There you have it. That'll be all for now :) Goodnight!