BALLER STATUS!!!!!

Eeeeeeeeep! Now I just have to keep it that way :D

Pound it... Snaillll!!!

Haha, Stephanie {one of my SAO sisters} could not even believe that! She literally burst into hysteric laughter and giddiness. That made me happy :) I just like seeing people happy and excited! I also taught her awkward squid, awkward palm tree, and awkward octopus :) It was a fun time.

Today was pretty swell. Classes were painless, I was able to complete my two writing assignments and my discussion board, and I got to spend some quality time with my sorority sisters {technically soon to be sisters}. I got to interview Jenn today, and we had a big SAO dinner tonight at Madison Grill :) It was so nice to be able to hang out with so many of the girls at once. It made the night both fun and entertaining :) Whether it was taking silly pictures, sharing "awkwards," or just laughing at ridiculous stories, everyone seemed to be in a good mood and in high spirits. That kind of thing is contagious, you know. And I'm so glad that I went because it definitely soothed much of the stress and anxiety I had been feeling since last night. I don't know what it is about fellowship that can completely uplift your mood, but I do know it's by the work of God! And He blessed me with a lovely community of sisters :) {Thank You for that!} I do love those girls!

On a separate note, I have no idea what I'm going to be for Halloween! Ugh! If you have any suggestions, please send them my way! Goodnight my sweet loves!

One of Jenn's favorite verses:

^"5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart
       and lean not on your own understanding;

⁶ in all your ways acknowledge him,
       and he will make your paths straight"

{Proverbs 3:5-6}

Shortage.

This blog is going to be incredibly short because I am tired and I have so much work I need to do it but my eyes are all heavy and I am slightly overwhelmed....

Yeah, that run-on sentence right there accurately depicts how I feel inside :( I just want it to be Friday! I just hate that I have so much to do! This stupid "credible sources" thing for writing, a reader response paper for writing, chapter 10 notes for PSYC, a discussion board for SOCI, and the last Tech Level 1 test for GCOM. I want to bang my head against the wall until I'm asleep and won't care about this anymore.

I don't like stress...

"My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest."
{Exodus 33:14}

God knows how badly I would like to rest...

These thoughts come to me in periodic waves

and it's hard to think about anything else. Whenever I'm getting to know someone, my brother always seems to come up. It's not a bad thing, I just don't know whether or not I should say anything because I don't want to make light conversation turn heavy. Needless to say, Matt is very much on my mind right now, and I'm wishing I could talk to him, hug him, or something...

I didn't mean for this post to be depressing--my sincerest apologies. I'll do a quick synopsis of today's events. I did reading for GCOM until 1, at which point I thought my brain would implode. I then got dressed and went to get some lunch before class at 2. All of that reading and it turns out there was no quiz. I'm not complaining; I just wish I had known that in advance. Once again, I had to fight off my body's urge to sleep, but this time it was during my PSYC class. I'm used to it in the mornings, but not 3:30 in the afternoon. I'm starting to wonder is something is wrong with me, because I seriously cannot keep my eyes open. When I try everything gets kind of blurry and head starts to loll and it's just weird. But sometimes there will be an out-of-place noise or something that snaps me back into being awake and attentive. It really is the strangest thing ever. Anyways, once class was done, I went on a Kline's ice cream date with my SAO family {Ariel, Abbey, Kelly, and Sarah}! I'm so glad we all finally got to get together! The only times I've seen Kelly and Sarah have been in passing, so it was nice to actually be able to talk to them and get to know them a little better :) Unfortunately, I had to go to another government movie tonight, but it was cool because I got to talk to/sit by Kirsten {another SAO candidate}. So I got to know her a little better too! When I finally got back on campus, it was time to grab dinner. Yeah, I had dinner at like 9:30, kind of a fail. But hey, what can you do? I actually ate in Brittany and Brianna's room so that I could talk to them and see how their days went. I hadn't seen them at all today before that point, so I felt that dropping by was essential. Since I departed from their room, I have done my homework for tomorrow and I am now ready for bed. Goodnight my dear loves!

Beth's other favorite verse:
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you."
{Deuteronomy 31:6}

So many thoughts

swirl around in my brain over the course of a day, and I only wish I could retain the initial spark that made me want to blog about them in the first place. But over the course of time, homework, and stress the inspiration has waned... It really is a pity. But I think I'll give a shot anyhow.

God's timing is never a coincidence. It is always perfect and intentional. I will often credit the appearance of opportunities to luck or an accidental stumble-upon, but the truth is that our Father knew that these things would take place; and He knew that I would be here in this very place and time to embrace and experience these opportunities. My Father knows what's best for me. He knows not only the direction I will take in life, but also the course in which He wants me to take. That's kind of a scary thought, isn't it? God has things in this life that He wants us to do, but He also knows if and when we will mess it all up. {Thank you, free will.} But it's marvelous to know that we are loved no matter how awful our state. Praise and thanks be to God for grace, mercy, and salvation through His son Jesus Christ :)

"In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will..."

{Ephesians 1:11}

"But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations."

{Psalm 33:11}

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'"

{Jeremiah 29:11}

The other night, when watching the end of the Exorcism of Emily Rose, I was reminded of a question that has lingered in my brain before. The question involves a lot of "what ifs" and circumstantial inquiries, but my solution is generally always the same. Would I sacrifice myself if it benefitted the lives of others? When I say "myself," that doesn't necessarily mean my life; it can include/encompass my health, well-being, or potential gain. In the movie, Emily hears the voice of Mary, and she gives Emily two options. One is to be freed from her human body and be free in the peace and glory of Heaven. The other option is to remain in her human body until its natural death and continue to suffer the torture of being invaded by the six demons that inhabited it, but by doing so others would come to Christ and be saved. Her choice was to remain on earth. She suffered so that others would come to know God. I'd like to think I'd do the same. I know it's easier to say than if you were really in such a situation, but looking at it logically brought me to that conclusion. I would rather have others reap the benefits of salvation than obtain my own personal satisfaction. Even on a smaller scale, I would gladly give up anything I could to ensure that someone else could prosper and be happy. I would rather bear burdens and struggles than have my friends overwhelmed by them, and I would rather endure pain and suffering than to watch others go through it... And that is that.

"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends."
{John 15:13}


"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers [and sisters]."
{1 John 3:16}

There are certain people in my life that I hope to remain there forever. I sometimes wonder if they feel the same way, or if one day our relationship will be a distant memory. That may seem silly to think about, but how often does that happen? How many times has that already taken place in our lives? I don't wish for anyone to go anywhere. And more than anything I want us to stay as close as we are now. That is one of my biggest prayers, that nothing will be lost or diminished. I love you all too much for that! You have helped shaped who I am as a person and you make my life one full of joy and love :) I know I've said this before, but I can never thank you all enough for everything you've done in my life. You are my biggest inspiration, and my most beloved treasure. Goodnight, my dear loves :)

And on a rather random note, I really love this song :) I used to be obsessed with it back in middle school.

<(0)>

128 miles later...

I greeted the world at 8 AM today so that I could meet my dad at Einstein's at 9. Yay for sleep deprivation... We finished up at around 10:15, so I decided to go get the things I needed from Walmart before heading over to church. Mistake. I waited in line for probably 15 minutes. I won't say anything further in regards to why I had to wait that long, because it could come out sounding rash. Let's just say that my mood went from impatient, to agitated, to even more impatient, to frustrated, to border-line anger. By the time I finally got out of there, it was almost 11, and I had hoped to already by at church by that time so that I could socialize with my dear WEAG family. I still got to see and hug everyone, though, so I can only complain but so much. I loved being back in my home {and by that I of course mean the church}. Sitting in the front row with beloved friends all around, awesome worship, and the comforting feeling of familiarity in everything. Having to leave all of that today was almost as hard as when I left in August. I had to leave early, and there was no time to get lunch with anyone or anything of that sort. The people I care about more than anything else in this world were all there, and I had to leave it all. Good thing emotional farewells are my specialty... As a dear friend stated, "goodbyes don't get any easier." She's right, they don't. When I came back home, everything felt right in the world. Everything was as it used to be just a few months ago. Late nights at my darling Elizabeth's house, late night/early morning Waffle House trips {my little Kathyn, Kim, Jesse, Carlton, Destry, Julie, Eric}; Sweet Frog and Teavana endeavors with my beloved Heather; dinner dates with my lovely {should be older sister} Nikki; film watching and nom nom splendor with my lovely Kelly, Elsbeth, and Heather; little sleep; and church, where my whole family is united in one home. I tried so hard to not let my emotions get the best of me, but my eyes failed me as usual with their leakage. I fought it back on the drive home, and it was completely masked for the car ride back here with my dad. It's not that I'm sad to be back at JMU, it's just not the same, at least not yet. But I want to thank you for your friendship, for loving me at my best and my worst.  I know sometimes I'm an utter train wreck, and sometimes maybe a tad irrational. But I'm blessed in that you all still love me no matter what, and I can't imagine going through this life without any single one of you. I love you all so incredibly much! I shall see you again in 34 days. Hopefully the time will fly! Sweet dreams, my loves.

One of Beth's favorite scripture pieces:
¹ O God, you are my God, 
       earnestly I seek you; 
       my soul thirsts for you, 
       my body longs for you, 
       in a dry and weary land 
       where there is no water.

 ² I have seen you in the sanctuary
       and beheld your power and your glory.

 ³ Because your love is better than life,
       my lips will glorify you.

 ⁴ I will praise you as long as I live,
       and in your name I will lift up my hands.

 ⁵ My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods;
       with singing lips my mouth will praise you.

 ⁶ On my bed I remember you;
       I think of you through the watches of the night.

 ⁷ Because you are my help,
       I sing in the shadow of your wings.

 ⁸ My soul clings to you;
       your right hand upholds me.

 ⁹ They who seek my life will be destroyed;
       they will go down to the depths of the earth.

 ¹⁰ They will be given over to the sword
       and become food for jackals.

 ¹¹ But the king will rejoice in God;
       all who swear by God's name will praise him,
       while the mouths of liars will be silenced.

{Psalm 63}